Something I've been thinking a lot about lately and trying to apply it to my own life to make me a better person - and to be honest with myself: the need for validation. We all want to feel valued and feel that the decisions we are making are right. We all want to believe we are knowledgeable, intelligent, beautiful, beloved, skilled, accomplished, and so forth. It appears that now, more than ever, there are those who are going to tell us exactly what we are wanting to hear... to give us validation for doing what we are doing (or even not doing anything at all) and everything is perfectly acceptable and everything we do is worthy of recognition - as long as it is accompanied by tangible proof, some sort of certification or approval by an "authority" on the matter.
The concerns I have in this are:
1) We seek validation, even if it isn't truly honest and our egos are boosted by false benchmarks or overinflated measures. The harm this does is that anyone who buys into false or overinflated validation may feel comfortable with mediocrity and this leads to apathy... or actually worse, because when one's self-image is bolstered by fabrications and fantasy, that person no longer feels the need for self-improvement and thereby languishes in regressive thoughts and behaviors. For instance, if someone is told, "you're good enough" often enough, why go through the pain, discomfort or inconvenience of trying harder? I have seen how social media can be a major crutch for those who suffer from a low self-esteem. Rather than getting out and busting hump to try to make a difference personally or in the community, a social media subscriber can simply fish for compliments... and get them. Sometimes, people go to great extremes to try to get validation, even to the point where they could have actually spent the time and effort to accomplish something worthy of praise, rather than just seeking undeserved praise or reassurance.
2) On the flip-side of this, some of us may feel like our efforts are wasted unless we actually get a tangible award or some other kind of proof of an accomplishment. This mentality leads to frustration and makes us believe that unless we have the proper credentials, we are not worthy to bear a particular title... we don't have the bragging rights. I see this with over-competitive people or narcissists wishing to use their credentials as a means to substantiate whatever position they are trying to prove. Once again, the end result could be overconfidence and the feeling of not needing to keep learning or trying harder. For others, it could lead to an endless pursuit of tangible rewards for accomplishments... and endless frustration at never being good enough. So, such a mentality could make a person either feel overqualified or under-qualified for a particular job or situation at hand. The reality is that you can either do the job or not. If you don't have training or experience in a specific field, you are unqualified. The regrettable outcome of this is that with such credentialing, we become divisive. We set up a system wherein there are classes and sub-classes in our society and this gives undeserved power to those with such credentials, even if they are totally unqualified to be in such a position and those who lack tangible awards from an "authorized" source are passed over, scorned and ignored - even though they may be the best qualified to deal with the particular problem at hand.
In making these statements, I would suggest approaching this subject with caution. Are credentials important? Absolutely... if (and only if) they are obtained honestly and through the appropriate efforts. Do we need credentials? Well, it all depends upon what you're doing. If you are a career professional where such credentials are necessary (such as anything dealing with medicine, law or any other field where certifications are crucial), but there are many instances where such credentials are not necessary and I would contend that in some cases a formal "education" could get in the way of progress or kill a creative individual's passion altogether. It is entirely possible for a student to acquire their knowledge and skills independent of any formal academic setting... and to become an expert in their field. We all should acknowledge that people can be "educated" or "experts" without even possessing tangible proof (such as a diploma or certification) and it's time for us to also acknowledge that just because a person possess a document stating they have paid their tuition and passed the necessary qualifiers, they are necessarily experts in that field... or any other field.
This may sound cliché, but "the proof is in the pudding. If you've got it, you've got it. If you don't, you don't... and no amount of validation is going to change anything.
